How come flies, after landing on someone or something, start rubbing their “hands” together? Planning something? –John Oliveros, Montreal
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We know that flies are cleaning themselves (as opposed to plotting) because when they get dirty they clean themselves more, starting first with the dirty part and concluding by dusting off their forelegs. The smart fly–granted there isn’t a vast difference between a smart fly and a dumb one–keeps its legs clean because they contain an abundance of taste and tactile receptors, the better to savor the flavor of whatever rank thing the fly lights on next. Interestingly, flies clean more when in the presence of other flies, no doubt in an effort to get lucky. Girl flies, perhaps predictably, spend more time preening than boy flies.
Additional quantity of words that have been written about fly cleaning: 5,000. Additional quantity of said words that are even remotely interesting: 0. Additional quantity of words to be vouchsafed here: Guess. Thank God you’ve got a guy like me to filter the dull facts of life.
Art accompanying story in printed newspaper (not available in this archive): illustration/Slug Signorino.
