Hey, Faggot:
A guy who digs chicks with great big tits is free to place personal ads that read “boy seeking big-boobed broads.” Or he can go out on the town and hit on women with big tits. I like guys with big teeth (long story). In a personal ad, I could lay out my dental requirements in advance of a meeting, or I can simply hit on guys with big, sexy teeth. Your particular interest, however, places you at something of a strategic disadvantage. You can’t tell if a guy is uncircumcised till you pull his pants down, whereas I can tell if a guy has big teeth pretty much right away. Since the majority of men your age are circumcised (thank God), you’re going to have to be a bit more proactive than guys into big tits or teeth.
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You can join a gay gym, hang out in the showers, and present intact men your phone number on laminated cards. Or you can flat out ask guys who flirt with you if they were brutally mutilated by crazed, knife-wielding surgeons–Jewish surgeons, in all likelihood–when they were defenseless little baby boys (whoa! sorry about that: I’ve been reading the anticircumcision/anti-Semitic tracts on the Net). But you’re going to hear yes most of the time, making this approach both time-consuming and frustrating. Or you can save yourself a lot of time and trouble (and a gym membership) by giving the dreaded personals a whirl.
I have a crush on my boss. I’ve known he has a girlfriend for months, so of course I’ve kept my distance and professional demeanor. I tell myself not to get my heart set on hooking up with him because these obstacles are significant and not under my control. But I can’t help noticing him noticing me, and I wonder if he’s considering our options for some point in the future. I fantasize that on the day I give my notice, he will announce he has broken up with his girlfriend and wants to start seeing me. The likelihood of events unfolding in this manner is not too promising, yet I continue to daydream about him, and can’t ignore the spark I feel when we interact at the office.
Hey, S:
