Suet May Ho wasn’t frightened at first when the women began to lay stones on her body. But then they carefully put stones over her mouth and her eyes. Ho couldn’t breathe easily or see, and she could feel and hear something being burned next to her. Then she did feel frightened, breathing rapidly from her sense of helplessness. But she knew that she was the willing container for the women’s own overwhelming sense of helplessness, and that to become too frightened would betray their trust. So she held on.
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Another of the women’s griefs was that they were not able to bury their children and other loved ones who died in Cambodia. In the mourning ritual, dancer Ho–who in other therapy sessions had taken the role of their memories–was lain on the ground and the Christian women covered her arms, legs, torso, and face with lines of flat white stones, resembling the bones of a skeleton. Meanwhile the Buddhist women drew pictures of their loved ones. After burying Ho in stones, the Christian women made intricate patterns on the floor with the stones, and the Buddhist women stepped inside them and set their pictures on fire.
Robin, who treats mainly victims of incest in her full-time work, knew that repressed memories are often “stored” in the body as headaches or painful shoulders. The most extreme bodily symptom for victims of torture is hysterical blindness, when a person can’t see though nothing is wrong with the eyes. Art therapy, Robin found, was often a good alternative to talking therapies, a good way to release memories for survivors of both incest and torture. She began using various kinds of art therapy with the Cambodians in the first year, in weekly group sessions that usually attracted four to ten women.
Although the therapy group broke up about a month ago, Erkert hopes that the members will attend the concert as a group. Robin notes that attending may be therapeutic for them–even watching dance can release the memories stored in their bodies–but Erkert seems to want the women to come as friends. “They always did profoundly beautiful things in our sessions,” she says. “This seems strange to say, but our sessions were filled with more laughter than I’ve ever had. There were many dark moments, but there was also a tremendous amount of humanity.”
