Captured at http://www.cheme.cornell.edu/-slevine/
Manhattan, 5th Avenue, Gioretties Imported Shoes. Only one pair of black, lamb fetus leather, spiked pumps left. Coming through the front door, freshly released from Club Fed is Leona Helmsley. She spies these oh-so-perfect shoes in the showcase and makes a beeline for them. She must have them at any cost!
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At the same time, in the rear of the store, a door marked “VIP Secret Entrance” opens. In walks Imelda Marcos, looking for a new funeral ensemble. From across the store Imelda’s carefully honed shoe-sensitive eyes spot the same pair of shoes. What perfection! She must have them as well. No other pair will do.
BRIAN: Gotta be Leona on this one, Steve. I mean she’s been in prison for the past several years! Aside from the obvious RAGE ™, she has been desperate for a good pair of pumps. In case you haven’t noticed, the shoes in women’s prisons aren’t exactly fashionable….Similar to a man being released from prison heading straight to the nearest singles bar and/or brothel, Leona has years of “fashion tension” built up inside of her and it needs to be released. And heaven help anyone who gets in the way (Imelda, salespeople, small mammals, etc.).
Imelda laughs in Leona’s face. “Foolish woman. When it comes to shoes, you cannot defeat me.” Hideous laughter ensues, and Imelda brings a knee to Leona’s midsection, leaving her doubled over on the floor. Imelda wins easily.
